Netflix and Chill

Earlier this year I met this guy (we'll call him "netflix and chill" for reasons you're about to read) that I was pretty excited about.  We met at a party and immediately hit it off. His best friend is a good friend of mine and he's also pretty good friends with my best friend's husband.  Honestly, I'm surprised it took as long as it did for us to meet.  At this party we hung out together the entire night. He even stayed behind when his best friend went home so we could keep hanging out. When the party ended I ended up taking him home.  I know what you're thinking.  NO, nothing happened.  It was totally innocent.  And when I say nothing happened, I mean nothing.  He didn't even ask for my phone number.  He hit me with a, "well we seem to have a lot of mutual friends so I'm sure we'll see each other again."  And that was it.  Now this seems to be the shit that happens to me all the time, so driving home I didn't give it much more thought than a shrug and an "oh well."

Now let's fast forward about 6 weeks.  Yes, SIX weeks.  I'm out with friends one night and get a text from a number I don't recognize.  It was Netflix and Chill!  I was kinda giddy and excited to hear from him.  He got my number from my best friend's husband and we talked through text for a few hours that night.

In the beginning he played it exactly by the book.  I'd hear from him every other day or so through text, then he would call and we'd talk on the phone for hours, then we finally decided to get together as a group with our friends.  We had a fun night out and he walked me to my car, hugged me goodnight and we left.  He called me that night to make sure I made it home safely and we ended up talking another three hours or so on the phone.  Things were going so well!

Now, I was really adamant about NOT inviting him to my house to hang out, even if we were having a get-together, until we had been out on a date first.  I didn't want him to get too comfortable hanging out at the house and it all of a sudden turn into a friend thing.  (Story of my life.)  BUT, my girlfriends talked me into having him over for one of our Friday night get-togethers, so I did.  It wasn't so bad.  Everyone hung out pretty late and he was the last one to leave.  He kissed me that night and mentioned going to dinner one night that next week.  Perfect!

Well let me just say, I believe I am STILL waiting on that dinner outing to happen.  His idea of date night is........Netflix and chill.  Or HBO and chill.  Or On Demand and chill.  And not the Netflix and chill you see all over the internet and in Urban Dictionary.  I mean like literally takeout for dinner and movies on the couch.  Every.Saturday.Night.  For the five months we saw each other (I know, I can't believe I let it go on that long.) that is what we did.  Oh, and he LOVED documentaries.  So our nights would consist of eating dinner while we started a documentary, me falling asleep on the couch shortly after, then waking up to see credits rolling and him asleep on the other side of the couch. We'd wake up long enough to move to the bedroom and start another movie/show on netflix (no I'm not kidding) and then fall right back asleep.  Seriously y'all, he even got me an Amazon Fire TV Stick for my birthday so we could have netflix in my room.  I can't make this stuff up.

Please don't get me wrong, some of the best times I've had with guys has been chilling at the house and just enjoying each other's company.  But in that 5 months I promise we didn't go out more than 5 times.  I mean, can we NOT order pizza or Chef Shuttle tonight?  Can you at least take me to a drive through and buy me a frosty?  Let's live a little, am I right??

Needless to say I let this one go.  I do still hear from him from time to time.  Often, actually.  In fact, he wants to hang out this weekend but I don't know.  I'm feeling adventurous and that doesn't include my couch and TV.

Seriously, ladies.  I'm about to go against all the advice your mama ever gave you.  If you're still in your 20s, just settle.  Find a man and settle.  Because it doesn't get any easier in your 30s.  Haha ok, ok.  I'm just kidding.  Don't you dare settle for anything less than you deserve.  Clearly I haven't because at this very moment I'm Hunting Channel and chilling....all by myself.  ;)

Talk soon,

Jess

That One Time I Online Dated

Online Dating.  I know so many people that have tried it and lots that have actually been successful at it.  Frankly, the whole idea of it kinda gives me anxiety.  BUT, the man pool in Memphis seems to be slim pickins these days, so my only two single friends and I decided that we were going to try it out. 

I sat and painfully answered all those dumb questions that help you find your "matches," wrote a little about myself, uploaded some pictures, and boom.  Done.  I immediately started getting messages on there from all kinds of boys and I thought, "YES!  Boys love me!"  I chatted back and forth with a few guys that were harder to talk to than my living room wall, saw more pictures of penises than I've seen in my entire life, and kinda started talking to one guy that seemed like he might be ok...all in the first 2 hours. I kept chatting back and forth with this one guy through the site until he finally thought we should exchange phone numbers and text instead of message through the site.  So that's what we did.  After getting about 641644614516 more pictures of penises, I decided my time on an online dating site was over.  I lasted a whole 48 hours but thought, maybe something will still come of this normal-seeming guy, and if so I can still kind of believe in online dating.

The guy (we'll call him Mike) and I kept talking through text for a few days before he asked if he could call me.  Whoa!  Slow down there, Mikey!  He called, we talked, it was good.  He eventually asked me out for a drink so I agreed to meet him.  After all, it seemed to be going well so far.  I had already learned enough about him to at least think he was interesting.  So I met him at my local watering hole, where I was sure to know plenty of people.  He looked nothing like his pictures, but was still not a bad looking guy.  We sat at the bar and got through all the awkward "nice to see you in person" crap and I thought, ok.  This isn't so bad.  And then it happened.  Within 20 minutes of sitting there at the bar chatting, and with tons of people around, he started attacking my face with his tongue.  Just out of nowhere.  I SAID SLOW DOWN THERE, MIKEY!  Like I literally had to physically push him away from me.  Luckily, we both had other SEPARATE plans that evening.  I set it up that way on purpose in case he sucked and thank God I did because he did.  My other plans happened to be on the patio of the bar I was already at, so I just stepped outside and joined my friends, who were already laughing hysterically at me but told me I should give it one more shot.  That's when the bartender walked out and very sternly said, "No, she will not be giving that guy another shot."  Within about 30 minutes I got a text from Mike that said, "I already miss you."  Um, I'm sorry, what? 

Mike and I texted back and forth a couple of more days but I just let that one fade as quickly as possible.  Until the awesome, wonderful, perfect night I ran into him while I was out listening to a friend's band play.  He started texting me from the same room and I freaked out a little bit.  Thankfully I was with one of my best guy friends and was able to play that in my favor.  After ignoring all 57 of his texts from the same room, I never heard from good ol' Mikey again.  And I never tried online dating again.

Side note:  My only two single friends that I mentioned in the beginning are now both in relationships.  And NOT from online dating.  So here I still sit:  Jessica, party of 1. 

Til next time,
Jess

Happy Memorial Day and My Long Weekend Without Social Media

First of all, Happy Memorial Day! Take some time to remember those that have laid down their lives for this country! 

Long weekends are always fun, right?  I decided I'd use this long Memorial Day weekend to detox myself from all things social media.  I don't exactly consider myself to be addicted at an unhealthy level, but with smart phones allowing us to have facebook, twitter, instagram, etc. at the tip of our fingers, it's really easy to let social media take away from relaxing alone time or time with the people we love.  So that was my challenge to myself.  Nothing crazy, just 4 full days without checking social media.  I took all the apps off my phone so I wouldn't even see a notification.  I have to say, it hasn't been bad!

Since Friday was a half day, my boss let us all work from home.  So at noon on Friday I logged off of my work computer and decided it was play time.

It was such a pretty day, so I got some swing time in with these three crazies!  Y'all know I love my niece and nephew monkeys, so being outside with them without the distraction of facebook or instagram notifications dinging on my phone every 2 minutes was just so much fun!

Later in the evening I met my mom, uncle, sister, and niece for dinner.  Usually at family meals I try to keep my phone put away anyways, but of course that doesn't always happen.  It was nice to be able to sit at dinner with them and actually talk and just be with each other.

(Not to mention being able to enjoy my niece's chocolate pudding dessert.)

Saturday was another beautiful day.  I got up, got a little workout in, went shopping, and spent some time outside.  Later Saturday night my man friend came over and we had our usual Saturday date night of takeout and movies.  Again, just spending time together without checking my phone every few minutes was so enjoyable.  (He's not on any social media, so it's never an issue for him.)  Side note:  we used Chef Shuttle for the first time on Saturday night.  Excellent.

Sunday started out really nice weather wise.  I went over to my crazy friend Ellen's house.  She and her husband have an annual Memorial Day lunch cookout/pool party.

The food was excellent and the company even better.  And any time you can pull one of the guys away from the swimming pool basketball game to take a picture of all the girls, you know you're doing good.

I left the pool party early to head over to my bestie's house to cookout dinner with her and her husband.

I used this cookout as an opportunity to pop open a bottle of wine from the new Delta Blues Winery here in town.  It was given to me for my birthday and I'm just now getting to try it.  Not bad! My man friend came over there a little later and we cooked hamburgers and hot dogs and just hung out. After finishing the entire bottle having a couple of glasses of wine we figured it was probably time to call it a night.  It ended up being a longer one that I had planned.

That brings us to today.  I was invited to do a couple of different things today with a couple of different groups of friends and I wish I could have done it all!  I'm not as young as I used to be and it takes me a little longer to recover from a fun night these days!  I did get a chance to check out the new Sprouts Farmers Market in Cordova and I CANNOT WAIT until the one in Germantown opens!
My time away from social media has not been near as difficult as I thought it might be.  Now, we all know I'm way too much of a social butterfly and way too nosy to stay off forever, so I will jump back on there tomorrow to catch up on everybody's lives and see what all I've missed.  But I have to admit, it has been such an enjoyable weekend being with the people I love...I mean actually BEING with them.

How was your Memorial Day weekend?

                                                                          Jess

What's been going on?

I slightly recall in my last post mentioning I might try to write a little more often.  That was more than two months ago.  Oops.  But one of my favorite friends recently started her very first blog and now I'm inspired.  By the way, you should check her out here.  I guarantee it's going to be entertaining! 

I guess the biggest thing that's happened in the last two months is that I've moved here:

I'm living alone again and so far it's been FABULOUS!  I live in  Germantown, TN and I love it.  It's been a great gathering place for me and my friends for low-key weekend nights.  I can't wait to do a home tour post, but the house needs some serious cosmetic work before I do that. 

Other than that I've been on some dates (nothing to write home about), attended the fabulous 4Memphis Magazine party again, and sang the National Anthem for the V3 MMA Fights at Minglewood Hall in Memphis.  So I guess it's been a busy couple of months.

I'm making this post short and sweet because I just remembered I'm in charge of dropping off a birthday gift tonight...oops again.  I plan to show up around here a lot more often, so we'll see!



Some 4Memphis after party fun!



Fun night with the Eden ladies at the 4Memphis party!

Some 4Memphis after party fun!

See you soon!  Xoxo


                                                                                                                           Jess

Happy New Year

Who's excited for a new year?  Who was more than ready to put 2014 in the books?  So we're four days in...how are those resolutions?  

If I'm being honest, 2014 wasn't a terrible year for me.  Yeah it definitely had its downs.  It downright sucked at times.  But I can't complain too much.  I met some of my most favorite new friends in 2014, got a new niece, got a new nephew, finally took control of my health and wellness (have lost 53 lbs so far...what up!), landed an awesome job, did some traveling...it was pretty great.  I'm super excited to see what 2015 will bring!  

So I'd say if you haven't broken your new years resolutions yet you're doing pretty darn good!  Or are you one of those people that thinks making resolutions is cliche and dumb and pointless? That's ok, too.  I definitely get it.  But I do think the beginning of a new year is a good time to reevaluate things. You know, to make sure we're doing things to make ourselves happy and healthy. I think it's important to reevaluate old habits...maybe some friendships...just to make sure we aren't on the verge of toxicity.  So that's what I've begun to do.  I didn't make any resolutions, per se. Wait, yes I did.  I made one.  But it's a secret and only a couple of people very close to me know about it so that they can keep me accountable.  ;) I have begun, though, to reevaluate life, habits, friendships...just to make sure I'm keeping myself happy and healthy.  

So that's the deal.  What are your plans for 2015?  Are you as excited as I am??  Maybe I'll even blog a little more often....

                                                                                                                                                     Jess